Friday, July 4, 2008

Horses and Buggies

Good bye birds and bees...hello horse and buggies!

I knew our trip would provide some humorous content for blogging. Our drive yesterday provided some great material.

We were riding through the beautiful Pennsylvania countryside enjoying horse and buggy sightings when the obvious question was asked, "Why don't they drive cars?" I explained that the Amish prefer to live a simple life without modern conveniences that might draw them away from God. Caroline thought the idea was absurd.

We then engaged in a sweet conversation about our relationship with Jesus, our Savior and God, our Creator. My six-year-old niece informed me that parents created their children. I really should learn to keep my mouth shut but I decided to take the conversation a little deeper. Big mistake.

I told Hailey that God created the very first people and that they, indeed, then had children of their own.

"Hey, Aunt Stacie, how DO mommies and daddies make their babies?" Well, umm, cough, sputter, umm "That's a really good question, Hailey. And God has a wonderful plan for how babies are made and I know your mommy wants to tell you that story." I thought that would be enough and was busy congratulating myself with imaginary high fives for having successfully avoided a real answer when the conversation continued...

"Hey, Aunt Stacie, how do babies eat?" This led to a discussion about, belly buttons, umbilical cords, and a natural segue into breast feeding. This elicitied an empassioned "o, yuck" from Maria. And then, of course...

"Hey, Aunt Stacie, how do babies poop and pee in their mommy's tummy?" which required another gently worded answer and another "o, yuck" from Maria.

At this point the big girls were snickering and I had begun to glisten with nervous sweat. A quick inventory through my arsenal of parenting tricks led me straight to the fine art of distraction. Food and a pit stop!

Once back on the road, the conversation was a distant memory (I hope for my sister's sake) for my younger passengers, replaced by mouthfuls of chocolate chip cookies. Myself, well, I'm a little scarred yet a little smarter by the whole exchange.

Simply stated: Nothing is simply stated when you're talking to an inquisitive six-year-old.


Emily B said...

I laughed until I cried! I'm picturing the whole thing and putting myself in your shoes and I just can't stop laughing! Thanks for sharing, Stacie! I love you!