Sunday, August 3, 2008

Can you smell it?

It's the scent of change. And it's in the wind.

Our summer of late mornings and lazy afternoons will soon be replaced by the routine of school and work...for everyone. Including me. I'm not sure where I'll be working but I know it will be a daily weekday occurrence.

And, (speaking in a whisper) I think I'm starting to get a little excited about the possibility. Is that really awful? I've been "just a mom" for so long now, I've begun to forget about the capable professional that I once was.

Don't get me wrong. I have Loved (note the capital "L") every minute of being home with my children these past five years that we've lived in Little Rock. This past year of intentionally sowing into the lives of both Caroline and Maria has been precious beyond words. A gift. A luxury. A blessing.

But I've also missed working. It seems that both finances and my need to not spend countless hours at home vacuuming while waiting to pick up the children from school are steering me in a new direction. Surprisingly, what started as a need to work to make ends meet has involved into something more. It's hard to put into words the emotion that the possibility has stirred within me. Excitement...anticipation...potential...fear...all rolled into a big ball of "I think I want this."

So, I have a job interview on Tuesday for an Office Representative position with an established Christian counseling clinic. It sounds like something I'd really like to do with potential for ministering to hurting people. It's also a full-time job which would result in a lot of change for our family. But if we've learned anything in the past 10 years or so, it's that change can be good.

There are also some other possibilities floating out there which could bring about the dreaded need to make a choice. None of the options are perfect. Perfect doesn't exist. If the choices present themselves the way I think they might I will need to weigh the needs and wants of our family, our finance, my fulfillment. Not an easy task I tell you. Not easy at all.

Simply stated: We'll just have to wait and see what happens.